A Motto for Discipleship
Remember these mottoes: “A job worth doing is worth doing well”; “Early to bed and early to rise”; “An apple a day keeps the doctor away”?
Now, to some of us, those statements are just pithy sayings. We may have heard them, but they didn’t necessarily change our lives. A saying becomes a motto only when you adopt it and live by it.
I remember making up some original mottoes for our family during these childrearing years: “Early bedtimes are for parents”; “Sisters are the best kind of friends”; “Fussing gets you nothing”; “Things go better with Coke” (wait a minute, that one isn’t original!).
Charlotte Mason had a great motto about education that I like to apply to our homeschooling. But I think it also applies to discipleship. She said, “Education is an atmosphere, a discipline, a life.” It seems like those three areas summarize discipleship quite well: Discipleship is an atmosphere, a discipline, a life.
Atmosphere
Though sometimes we hate to admit it, the saying often proves true, “If momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.” We parents, and especially mothers, are at the center of our family circles. We set the pace for the environment in the home. So the first crucial area of discipleship is making sure we are walking closely to the Heavenly Father. As we practice the presence of God and walk in His Spirit throughout the events of each day, we create an atmosphere conducive to discipleship.
Discipline
But simply setting the example and creating the atmosphere isn’t enough; our children need to be grounded in the Word. Bible study is not all there is to discipleship, but Bible study is an important part of discipleship. We must get our children into the Word and the Word into our children. Without this area of discipleship, our children will be tossed to and fro with every wind of false teaching.
The two main methods that I use for this area of discipleship are Bible reading/study and Scripture memory. We’ve already talked about the three levels of Bible reading/study: Great Stories, Guided Studies, Independent Studies. And we’ll talk more in-depth about the Independent Studies Level next month. The main point of all those levels is: make sure your children are in the Word.
The way to get the Word into your children is by Scripture memory. Scripture memory is important for all members of the family — not just the children. Memorizing God’s Word together can build great bonds between family members even as it strengthens them spiritually. Please don’t give your children the impression that memorizing verses is a trick they perform for treats or trinkets. Hiding God’s Word in our hearts should be a lifelong privilege and habit.
A few years ago we found a great little system to help with this aspect of discipleship. Using this easy system, we’ve been able to memorize (and remember!) hundreds of Bible verses together. In fact, we review all the verses we know every month, and it takes only five or ten minutes a day. Feel free to visit our other site, SimplyCharlotteMason.com to see the details of this easy and effective Scripture Memory System our family uses to get the Word into our children. Of course, you don’t have to use the same system, but do make sure you are intentional about this discipline of Scripture memory.
Life
Discipleship is an atmosphere, a discipline, and a life. Discipleship should be living — a way of life. As you are walking closely to your Heavenly Father, keep your children beside you and verbalize how you see your Father at work each day. Part of creating the atmosphere is seeing God in the events that happen, but making discipleship a way of life requires talking with your children about those things you see.
Of all people, Jesus certainly saw God’s hand at work in all the events that happened around Him. He didn’t need to talk about God’s working for His own benefit. But He was very careful to verbalize the ways that He saw God’s hand at work for His disciples’ benefit.
As you talk about the Lord’s faithful engineering of all that happens to your family members in the events of the day, your children will begin to think along those lines too. Seeing God in every situation will become a way of life.
Discipleship is an atmosphere, a discipline, a life. As you seek to disciple your children, cling to Colossians 1:28 and 29: “Him [Jesus Christ] we proclaim, warning [our children] and teaching [our children] with all wisdom, that we may present [our children] mature in Christ. For this I toil, struggling with all His energy that He powerfully works within me” (ESV, adapted). Ultimately, discipleship is the work of the Holy Spirit in our children’s hearts. Yes, we should be faithful to create the atmosphere, encourage the discipline, and live the life, but we must depend on His energy that powerfully works within us. It’s not about us; it’s all about God. And as we learn to recognize and respond to the Spirit’s promptings in our hearts, we, ourselves, will go deeper as followers — disciples — of Christ.
Q & A
Q: With three preschoolers, I’m struggling to find time for personal Bible reading and prayer. And when I do have time, I’m so tired that I can’t comprehend more than a couple of verses. I feel like a spiritual failure. Did you ever feel like this?
A: I remember the years with only preschoolers at home as being one of the driest times in my spiritual life. I basically went into survival mode and felt good if I didn’t backslide. My nourishment came in spurts, not a steady flow, and not big spurts — just enough to keep me going. And eventually, it did get better. I remember it not as a time of deep Bible study, but of desperately searching for nuggets of encouragement and wisdom. Maybe the reason those nuggets came in little spurts is because my tired brain couldn’t handle much more at a time. I remember someone telling me that she believed God gives extra grace to young mothers, and I sure needed it!
It will get better! This is only a season. Don’t be hard on yourself. Remember that Jesus said His yoke is easy — not hard, harsh, sharp, or oppressive. If you’re feeling a burden of a heavy yoke that seems to be hard, it’s someone else’s yoke; it didn’t come from the One Who tenderly carries those who are with young. Rest in Him. Your heart is still turned toward Him even if your body and brain are lagging behind these days. He understands totally. He knows your body better than you do, and He knows what’s going on with it. He knows our frame and remembers that we are dust. He is there to help you, not beat you over the head. Rest. He does not condemn you; He carries you.
Q: Why do you always have your girls with you?
A: While I may fall short of “always,” I do try to keep them by my side as much as possible. Walking through life together is simply the best way to follow Jesus’ method of making disciples. Here is a quick list of just a few reasons my girls stay with me:
- As we live through lots of situations together, I can seize teachable moments and apply Scripture on the spot — when they’re eager for the answers and able to make immediate application.
- They see my true character because I’m with them all day. (And I see theirs.)
- They hear my beliefs and counsel to others. What a tragedy if I should disciple other young ladies, yet fail to communicate those same principles to my own daughters!
- My presence can deter inappropriate comments and actions from peers or predators.
- They observe how I interact with others in various situations, even those I don’t agree with. And at an appropriate time, I can debrief the girls and hear their hearts on the matter or point out error and reinforce the truth.
- Sharing in my adult life activities removes some of the fear of the unknown and prepares them for adulthood.
- Our relationships are strengthened as we share the same events.
In short, what better way is there to teach and protect the girls’ spirits than by following Deuteronomy 6:6 and 7 and walking through life together?
Now, that being said, two points deserve mentioning: (1) Some activities I do alone or with just my husband or a friend; and (2) This arrangement of keeping the girls by my side works only because we have put forth the effort in training them so they are not a distraction but a joy to be around.
